Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Body Ego - 0 (but apparently, I'm "OK" with that)

Luckily, I place outer beauty lower on my priority list, because someone a little more "body conscience" would leave every one of my doctor visits crying. Let me 'splain with some examples that I have heard within the last few months. Mind you, these are health care professionals.
  • "Ewe, what concerns me is the texture and how small Larry is" (Ok... he didn't say Larry, but there was an "ewe")
  • "You look pretty dry"
  • "Hmmm, I don't usually feel the kidneys from the front...but your so thin and squishy." (I shit you not on that one. LOVE THIS DOCTOR. (really - he's a good doctor, and thorough)
  • "You have a fat throat" (And now I realize that out of context that sounds disgusting, but I promise it was completely relative as I was getting an ultrasound of my thyroid.)
  • "When are you due" (haha... stupid ascites, never creeps up when there is Maternity parking out front!)
  • "Once you have your transplant, you won't have that strange tint to your skin anymore" (Hey... what strange tint? haha)
  • "Oops, I thought that was it, but it was just a whole lot of scar tissue" ...I won't mention the "it" she was referring to - but apparently, I don't have one anymore. Just one more of the many things missing.
  • "Wow, what is all this scarring from?" (Yes, techs AND doctors have actually said WOW when they see my battle wounds. Luckily I am a weirdo, now gaining some pride in these -- Like my tattoos. (Ok, that is overstating my enthusiasm waaay to much - they are UGLY - but there is nothing I can do about them, so I wear 'em with honor and Bad-assness!) I admit, I am also someone you would see saying, "That's nothing, check this bad boy out!" Although it pains me to think that my bikini days ended early.
Awe, well I am sure I made you laugh, you monster! hehe. All in all yesterday was actually a very good visit. I don't know why I was so worried about the psych consult... I was scared that he would see something in me (a weakness or something) that I was unaware of. Something that would be a sign to him that I wasn't strong enough to go through this, or recover after. It sounds strange, but I figure that someone like this sees a lot of transplant patients, some successes, some not... Is there a secret to those that do well? (besides the medically obvious), a quality they possess? How am I really handling all of this? Strangely... I will now think of Dr Cobb as the nice cookie lady in The Matrix...hehe. He set my mind at ease and I left feeling right as rain. What did he say, you ask? ((Still smiling as it echos in my head)) "What you are facing is going to be extremely difficult, but I have no concerns that you cannot do it -- My only concern is keeping you down long enough to recuperate after the surgery!"
YES. I could've kissed him - He even started the statement with one of my faves "Look, I'm not going to sugar coat this...extremely difficult... yada, yada, yada... you can do it!" ...REALLY! That was it, in a nutshell.
Oh yes, maybe someone can spread some light on this thyroid thing... I'm not to concerned, but the tech said he saw a few cysts or nodules on the left lobe of my thyroid? I'll keep you posted, but I have a feeling my thyroid is no different then a lot of other stuff in my body... There are simply some strange things growing in there. (That is my personal medical opinion and I'm sticking to it!)
, I had to post that before I try and get a little more sleep this mornin'. Finally getting out of the house today... It has been a while since I have not being chaperoned for an appointment, or groceries by my hubby or dad...It will be just us girls chattin' n bakin' for Christmas!!

1 comment:

Craig said...

I love the attitude! That's just what is needed. Treat every doctors visit as a chance to connect with someone, to laugh with someone and to learn from someone! However bad the visit may be, there is always something positive you can take home from it.

Maybe I should have had my sanity checked??? :-)